Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Java Tampering

I headed into work today to start my daily routine of gulping down at least 3 mugs of coffee. I go into the sacred coffee area, and I start to pump the usually office's bitter caffeinated-sludge (that they try to pass off as coffee), when I smell an aroma.

It started out rather pleasant. I peered into my mug and notice it's not the usual ebony muck I force down. Then the smell hits me, like a
sumo wrestler on crack. It's amaretto hazelnut coffee. It smells ok, what could be the big deal? I grab my mug and head back to the land of cubicles.

I start in on the forever piling work load and set my coffee aside. As I'm sitting in my non-ventilated cube, I start to feel
queasy. The evil coffee was continually emitting a sickeningly sweet odor. I of course procrastinate quitting my work until the last possible second. I couldn't take it any longer, it was either the coffee or fresh air. I emptied that mug faster than a rain cloud in April. It was just sick.

Who makes coffee like that? Isn't coffee supposed to be for enjoyment? a caffeine high? a sugar high? for ingestion? Good gracious people! Choose one additive and stick to it! I prefer
caffeine straight up.

The worst part? Nobody liked it. It sat in the regular coffee urn for the ENTIRE day. No coffee for Rachel.

Bastards.

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