Thursday, December 15, 2005

The Geriatric Ward

Today I feel old and senile. Actually, most days I feel like that...

I woke up, after a non-restful night of sleep, feeling confused about where I was. I got out of bed, and I had to think about what I was going to do next. My bladder gave the instructions.

I finally made it to work without any major
mishaps along the way. We're having a big potluck today at work, and I was sampling some of the dishes, and deciding which ones to load up on, when I drooled. Yes, I drooled. Was it the smell of appetizing food? Was it from the lack of saliva control? Who knows, but it happened. Next, in my typical fashion, I tipped a can of soda to drink, only to wear what I was supposed to ingest. Hmmm maybe I need feeding assistance.

I think that my disintegrating joints/muscles/mind should take precedence over any feeding turmoil. My
icy hot is running low, and my joint stiffness is at an all time high. It's the cold weather I tell you! My hips make a rather unsettling crack if I move after being idle for more than a few minutes. Hopefully they'll stay intact a few years longer, but "it can turn into a life threatening illness". I may start my own support group, with a bonus of icy hot with your first visit.

In any case, not just the "elderly" are suffering the effects of age, so don't inflict your
ageism on me!

5 comments:

Rob/Twin said...

LMAO... OMG. This was hilarious! It totally made my afternoon! I can relate, Twin! Maybe it's time we check into the nursing home and spend the rest of our days (cracking and aching joints and all) together rocking on the front porch, knitting and yelling at the little brats next door to get off our lawn... :)

Rachel Irene said...

Sure! If I could knit longer than an hour... darn arthritis! And the rocking might be a little too physically strenuous for me... Bah!

shyestviolet said...

You've inspired me, O Geriatric One.

http://allgirlband.blogspot.com/2005/12/young-at-heart.html

I feel so dirty, blogging finally... like I've sold my soul to the devil...

Rachel Irene said...

Well I'm glad you have joined our blogging side, My Little Yearling.

Gary Freedman said...

In response to your inquiry, Rachel Irene. I like to surf the blogs and comment on ones I find interesting.